It’s not exactly the Dr. Manhattan condom or even the Force Trainer, but J.J. Abrams’ Trek movie does have some serious WTFery going on in the merchandising department, entering the realm of fragrance:
“Tiberius,” in honor of James Kirk’s middle name; “Pon Far,” touted as the Klingon version of “Passion”; and “Red Shirt,” named after the poor, red-shirted souls who never survive the episode.
A Red Shirt fragance, because there’s nothing quite like the smell of fail in the morning, huh? (And pon farr is Vulcan, not Klingon.) They’re not the first media property to branch out: Twilight did get there (and sued!) first. Still, Trek does seem like a reach.
Of course, should it be successful as more than an internet laughingstock and Lucasfilm chose to peruse this new market for Star Wars, there is really only one possible choice for a theme.
Ay carumba! “Tiberius”, because no one’s more enticing than arrogant playboys named after Roman emperors; “Pon Farr”, because forced mating is SO romantic; “Red Shirt”, because nothing says “I love you” like obscurity and imminent death. Um, I’ll take Lando’s “Smooth” any day. (Lando’s WAY more smooth than Kirk. “Smooth” would send “Tiberius” whimpering away in shame.)
And mistaking pon farr for a Klingon thing doesn’t inspire confidence. :p
To be fair, the pon farr thing could have been E’s mistake.
I think every man needs Star Trek cuff links.
Can you imagine what Red Shirt smells like?