Posted on by Dunc

The Bond Rejects

hughjackman.jpgSo no doubt you’ve learned now that Daniel Craig is going to play James Bond, right? You can’t go anywhere without seeing the horrible headlines. (Seriously, folks: Bond, James Bond? NO SHIT.)

Anyway, the rumor mill has gotten hold of a leaked “in-house memo” that gives reasons for not casting actors most people have actually heard of. Witness:

Hugh Jackman, it read, was “too fey”, Colin Farrell “too sleazy”, Eric Bana “not handsome enough” – and Ewan McGregor “too short” at 5ft10.

That’s just cold. Okay, we’ll give them Colin Farrell, ’cause the man personifies sleaze, and yeah, the Ewan excuse is lame, but is there any woman here who thinks of Hugh Jackman as “fey?” If Jackman is what Hollywood considers a sissy, we’re all doomed.

12 Replies to “The Bond Rejects”

  1. Perhaps the crazy perception of Hugh Jackman came about because of his doing musical theater, and playing a gay man in that production. But that is “acting” people. Sheesh!

  3. Sorry, but I choose Ewan ANY day over the guy they’ve picked as the new Bond. I feel a boycott of the francise coming on! ;-)

  4. I thought Eric Bana looked pretty good in Troy, myself. He was one of the few high points of that movie; I rather liked his characterization of Hector given the way the movie portrayed him as the moral hero, rather than Achilles, whom the Greeks would have felt was.

  6. Any of them looks better than that person they chose. He looks as if he were dredged up from a swamp.

  7. I suspect “The Boy From Oz” and his performances hosting the Tony Awards may not have helped, either. Eric Bana I’ll give them. Colin Farrell does nothing for me so meh. But wither Clive Owen (King Arthur)? Now, HE would have made a good James Bond.

    Sorry, Ewan reads as too boyish to me to carry off 007. But then I’m a (God help me) book fan where Bond is concerned. (Except 006/Alec. Give me Sean Bean being all sexy-evil any day. We didn’t actually SEE his dead body in Goldeneye…)

  8. I second the nomination for Clive Owen, although… well, James Bond. Not really caring too much.

  9. That’s just wild to me! As for the new guy, he’d better have a damn good makeup job to make me believe he’s some suave, debonair spy.

    And even though I think Ewan would have had a blast playing the part, I don’t think he’s right for the role. Not because he’s too short. Just because his talents are better used elsewhere.

    To my mind, Pierce Brosnan’s career suffered from his association with James Bond. I think we missed out on some prime acting from him

  10. A collective wave of hands if you watched Troy for the cinematography? Dude, men in SKIRTS! Who cares about lighting and plot???

    But yeah, they already chawed Ewan up and spit him out three months ago on this side of the pond but since he was crooning for the likes of us Wantons, no one cared. I personally want him to do “Guys and Dolls” the movie remake. Everyone should see Ewan in a nice suit.

    Sorry, reigning in my inner wanton, she is running amuck again.

  11. Hugh Jackman is manly and hot.
    Clive Owen would have been excellent.
    Sean Bean would be interesting as a “blonde Bond”.
    Ewan would be excellent though I think he’d get bored playing Bond for years.
    Who I’m thinking of is Jason Stratham- the guy from the Transporter. Yes, he’s partially bald but the man is handsome, has the accent, can act and make a fight look incredible. And he looks incredible behind the wheel. :) Plus, he’s not that big of a star to make everyone think he should be doing something else.

    Well, I guess I can take comfort that they are not replacing Bronsan with Timothy Dalton.

  12. Bean’s been a Bond villain and recently. I think there’s probably some sort of rule. Which is fine. I like him better as Alec.

    Clive Owen would have been a really good James Bond.

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