New Star Wars Halloween costumes go from tame to lame

'Sexy' but screen-based costumes

So this year’s authorized Star Wars Halloween costumes are out… And they are cheap but unremarkable, per usual. No, they won’t get you into the costume clubs, but no one will have trouble recognizing who you’re supposed to be, either. (Assuming they’re up on their Star Wars, at least)

And then there’s the faceplam-worthy ones. No, I’m not talking about the costumes above, which have been around for a while – though the headress for Darth Talon is pretty weird. However, it’s worth noting that that’s ‘sexy’ Ahsoka to go with the Padme and Leia, at least it’s not a sexy Ahsoka – the issue is almost entirely with the name and the fact that Ahsoka is, unlike Padme, Leia and Talon, a teenager.

But come on – you want the weird stuff, right? Right. Believe it or not, I’m going to ease you in, because the crazy is really crazy this year.

'Sexy' skirts! Gag.

No, these ‘sexy’ costumes (Vader, Fett, Stormtrooper, X-Wing pilot) aren’t particularly revealing – hell, for sexy Halloween costumes, they’re almost Puritan… But skirts? Really? Why not extend the sizing on the standard adult (read: dude) costumes. Here’s the X-Wing pilot! It’s perfectly fine! But it only comes in ‘standard’ and ‘XL.’ (For reference, Sexy Leia comes in x-small, small, medium large and even ‘plus.’)

Oh, and here are the girl’s versions. They’re pretty much… Exactly the same:

Girls costumes. Not 'sexy,' just skirts.

At least they don’t call them sexy, right? Girl Vader, Girl Fett, Girl Stormtrooper and, not pictured, Girl X-Wing.)

Yeah, they’re not so much offensive as just dumb. But I have, as promised, saved the worst for last. Check out this nightmare fodder:

The 'skin' offerings

Congrats, guys. The really creepy shit – ‘Second Skins’ Vader, Fett, Maul and Chewbacca – is all for you. Please try to resist the temptation.

(Stay tuned: I’ll be back with a palette-cleanser in an hour or so.)

20 Replies to “New Star Wars Halloween costumes go from tame to lame”

  1. The Chewbacca one is going to HAUNT MY SOUL. There is not enough brain bleach or palate cleanser in the world for that.

    Gender-swapped costuming is awesome. (A friend of mine made an X-Wing dress for MegaCon and it was awesome and adorable.) Mass-produced “girl” versions of costumes, are not. They’re inferring that women can only wear cheerleader style outfits, not the actual costumes themselves. I’m sure many women in the 501st and Rebel Legion would disagree.

  2. If I’d had any of the “Girl” costumes as a kid the first thing I would have done is add pants, because there’s no way I’m going out trick-or-treating in chilly October in a short skirt.

    The second skin things are just…no.

  3. That “second skin” Maul looks like Spider-Man. I agree with Nanci about Chewie. I wish I could un-see that costume.

  4. To be honest, I don’t mind the skirts as long as they also had a pant option. I know that’s too much to ask for a costuming company who just wants to make a sale, but some women (including myself) love wearing skirts. The problem is assigning us skirts because we’re “girls” and that’s what we should wear to come across as sexy. Pants can be just as sexy, imo. So like I said, I would like the option to be present for women who prefer to wear the pants and those who might prefer the skirt for the occasion. That Chewbacca, though. Scary as hell!

  5. For those skin things, it’s like they stopped doing art once they reached the waist. Sorry….ran out of talent. Ugh.

  6. If ANY man walked up to me in those “skins” outfits, no matter how fit, I would run away in terror.


    As for the girl’s costumes. Ugly.

    And why do they all need bathing caps?

  7. I am a little speechless and agree with Paula above. I can’t believe how truly bad the men’s ones are.

    I guess if I were to find a positive, I’m glad to see Ahsoka/Darth Talon made enough impact to be included as adult size costumes.

    Well, back to playing around with my new costume ideas for self.

  8. The Darth Talon one looks awfully top-heavy to me. Isn’t there a better way to make lekku?

    I agree about the skirts. Last year I had most of my skin covered, and I still nearly froze. Not to mention if you’re trying to beat the boys to the rest of the candy, the skirt will fly up.

  9. I so hope somebody uses the so called Chewbacca costume for a heist movie. Forget about Nixon masks, this is how people should rob banks.

  10. At least body exploiting costumes are going equal opportunity for men now. Yay?

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