The quotes of GenCon

These were compiled by Jennifer (Imperial Girl) but were sent to me for posting. Enjoy, bitches!

“The boys are playing with each other in the suite.” (Caitlin explaining where Rogue is.)

“Aw, pretty man fall down!” (Paula, watching a Romanian gymnast)

“The Chinese guy fell, so that’s okay. Stupid China.” (Caitlin on sportsmanship.)

“You all missed it. I got Dunc’s cherry.” (James on the visit to Steak N Shake)

“A lot of people have gotten Dunc’s cherry already.” (Paula’s rejoinder.)

“Yeah, he shouldn’t open his mouth. He should just stand there and be pretty.” (Caitlin on gold-medal gymnast Paul Hamm.)

“It’s like talking to PG. I don’t understand anything.” (Kelly on the jargon in James’s story.)

“Slashing action!” (Someone at marketing wasn’t thinking . . . )

“Die, adverb, die!” (Jennifer at the writer’s workshop.)

“I can flounce, too, if it’ll really disturb people.” (Aaron on swinging and flouncing.)

“Evil bears!” (Or, the official explanation for why Ani’s Tusken Raider pogrom is really okay.)

“So what does that make Alderaan? Evil chinchillas?” (Aaron’s logical follow-up question.)

“I bet Jesus wouldn’t have killed me with a lei!” (Luci on being killed by Kim.)

“Strip ’em down! Dress ’em up! Viiiiii-nyl!” (Team Vinyl!)

“Vegetarian spank inferno! Spank spank spank spank!” (Team Vegetarian Spank Inferno)

“That’s all right, that’s okay, we’re gonna kill you all someday!” (Team Luser)

“Faster! More intense! Faster! More Intense!” (The second-most hard-to-explain-to-mundanes picnic chant)

“Toss the dwarf!” (The first most hard to explain . . .)

“Stupid Machiavelli.” (Caitlin. Don’t ask.)

“The bitch needed to leave.” (Jennifer on Selinthia.)

“Evil ferrets, evil pandas, evil koalas, evil muskrats. . .” (More logical follow-up.)

“‘Okay, here he is with handcuffs and a mermaid.'” (Quoting the ex-member. Those of us who didn’t know her don’t want to know.)

“Harry got laid on in the back seat.” (Missi on why her cake got damaged.)

“The worst Mary Sues are in there to boink your favorite character.” (Jennifer on fanfic.)

“I want to change my name to Leia Amidala Organa Skywalker.” (Luci)

“I’ll bet she didn’t know who Machiavelli was.” (Aaron)

“See this ring? That means I went to MIT. That means I’m smart.” (Caitlin to random fanboy on Machiavelli.)

“I feel like we’re on Cheers.” (Caitlin on the Sunday suite.)

“I’m sure that’s what everybody thought after they read the book…” (Rogue on naming children after Legolas, ‘still the prettiest.’)

“In retrospect: not our best decision.” (On our discovery that lighting fifty or so sparklers in an enclosed picnic pavilion on a rainy day was not the best idea.)

“Beth leid many people.” (Beth insisted this be included.)

“Now I’m officially a pretentious merlot-sipping black-and-silver-ankh-wearing Goth chick.” (Jennifer after the wine was broken out on Sunday.)

“I think ‘bitch’ is the official word of the con. Has anyone not been called a bitch?”

“The sky is blue, the grass is green, Darth Vader is Luke’s father!” (Dunc on the facts of life for the post-ESB generation.)

“Spider-Man has BOOBS?” (Dunc with a hearing problem.)

“BOOTS, Dunc, BOOTS!” (Eliz clairifying.)

“A romantic drama with flesh-eating zombies. Or Romeo and Juliet meets Night of the Living Dead.” (Aaron on his movie.)

“Not that they cared. I could have said ‘this is Eva Braun here’ and they wouldn’t have noticed.” (Beth on her impersonation of Mary Franklin for the benefit of the Hyatt staff. But it did get our garbage picked up.)

“If you’re not part of the solution, you’re a Club Jader.” (Tim pretty much sums it up.)

“I’m sorry, I thought he said ‘incest’.” (Beth watching the Musical Edition.)

“Yay, none of my Imperials are naked!” (Caitlin again.)

“Vader was a chick?”
“No, he just has long hair.” (Rogue clarifying a fine point of the musical.)

“Okay, I was in school for four years, what was I doing?” (Dunc explaining her mad icon skillz.)

“Why can’t you just . . . farm them out of kennels or whatever it is you do with them?” (Jennifer explaining why she’ll never be a parent.)

“Oh, go to Flint!” (Jennifer and Dunc to merging idiot on I-75 south of Detroit.)

And of course:

“There’s no crying at GenCon!”

Coupling Quotes (we didn’t say them, but they’re still funny):
“I’m angry, making sense gets in the way!”
“Every morning I wake up glad I’m not you.”
“I’m a perverted moth, and you’re on fire.”
“Baaa. Baaa. Baaaa!”
“Vegetarian Spank Inferno!”

PCD Kickoff

We’re hanging out in the suite wasting time now. I swear we just started… Damn. I’m gonna miss everyone. Even PG.

I’m not going to IMAX Spider-Man either. Bitch is whiny enough in 2D; I don’t think I could restrain myself enough to see it with actual fans. The snark must flow.

Missi is coming soon to take my monitor, so this may be the last entry from the suite. Sorry we never got the camera up. :( Maybe next year.

Bounty for RIF

Club Jade is pleased to announce that it will be donating $912 to Reading is Fundamental.

The 4th Annual Club Jade Charity Auction was held tonight on the filk night of JadeCon. Over 80 items were donated by Club Jade and its friends. Most of the items were sold by teacup auction. Four of those items were sold via live auction, with Mary and Lisa fighting it out to win Susan’s “Where’s the Emperor?” book. (We knew that’d get them.)

Many thanks to those at the con and those who sent in items who couldn’t attend. There will be a lot of books purchased, as a result!

Evil Bears?

There’s a rumor going around that at a recent convention, someone mentioned that LFL sent out a memo to its licensees to explain that Anakin’s slaughter of the Sand People wasn’t so reprehensible because they weren’t sentient, but were in fact like animals–evil bears, in fact.

So, we’ve been having plenty of fun with the idea. :) Evil Bear Death Squad, anyone?

Not the breasts you’re looking for

Best post this while I’m still sober.

This morning was seminars… I only showed up for my own. Sorry. Then we headed over for the Episode III presentation with Mary… a last minute replacement for Steve Sansweet, VERY good. No revelations if you paid attention to all the Comic Con press and/or a Hyperspace member, but very much worth seeing. And Mary ROCKED.

Afterwards we spoiler sluts headed the the con suite to discuss spoilers and speculation. DIE PADME DIE. It was very civil. Really!

Now we’re hanging out on Dagobah, awaiting the closing ceremonies of the Galactic Games. It’s kinda dark… Stupid sexy mood lighting.

And they begin.

17 geeks (almost) dead by smoke inhalation

Tip: Don’t light sparklers in a pavilion.

The Galactic Games opened today. .. GO LUSERS! It was COLD. And RAINY. Enough to make me whine like a Skywalker. Who won? I don’t remember. Probably Spank.

Did I mention it was COLD. And WET? The Sith planned well.

But the Games were fun and the food was good, and PG got to practice the act of illegal parking, so it was worth the inevitable tuberculosis outbreak.

We just got back from the last game (Commandeering a Ship) which involved trekking halfway across the convention center. In my socks. Jedi Bitches! There were wonderful chairs, though. I can’t remember everyone who raced, but Tom Sam and Trina did try to cheat in their usual charming way.

And now the drinking!

Drunc Learns a Lesson

By supreme Acts of Mary’s Bar, I experienced my first hangover since my junior year of college this morning. I’m not even sure if that one really counts, since it was caused by half a can of Miller Lite. Ugh.

But this… Oh, this was a mighty hangover. Drunc is dead; Long live Drunc.

CJers, check your mail. Eliz has set up a test of the webcam in our room – we hope to have it up here in the suite tonight. Watch this space.

Live from JadeCon

It’s night one of JadeCon and we’re all wound up. We just got back from Games Night, where my team kicked ASS at Naboo (Taboo.) In what other crowd could I say “She’s dead, we hate her!” and people’s first guess is Callista? Who isn’t dead! Great fun was had by all. I love Naboo.

Profound I’m not, but I try. I just downed one of Mary’s drinks in five minutes. I’d like to see you blog half as well, when this drunk you reach.

Tomorrow is the Galactic Games. GO LUSERS! We will prevail; we are legion.

BREAKING NEWS: Not only is James (Sithspit) attending his first GenCon, he has just fetched his first bucket of ice. Life is good. Pass me another drink.