Posted on by Dunc

Snarky things on the Wookieepedia: Everything that has ruined Star Wars forever

Buried deep within the bowels of the Wookieepedia: A list of the many things that have ruined Star Wars! To quoth:

Fans realize something LFL does not, that robust 32-year-old billion-dollar franchises, while seemingly healthy, are in actuality as fragile as two bricks tied together with tissue paper. One mistake, one bad mis-step will cause the entire thing to shatter and fall apart; and Star Wars would be ruined forever.

Selections include midi-chlorians, Callista, Boba Fettishism and many, many more.

26 Replies to “Snarky things on the Wookieepedia: Everything that has ruined Star Wars forever”

  3. There used to be a brand timeline version of this that went along the lines of (using SW as an example)

    1977 – Star Wars is launched, thus ruining Star Wars forever.

    Very funny stuff.

  6. “…though it’s possible a proposed initiative requiring all Star Wars fans to purchase an annual “DVD offset” could ensure our fragile brand’s existence through the mid-21st century. ”

    Okay. This line made me snort.

  9. This is very funny–and makes me think about my complaints about Clone Wars in a (slightly) different light.

  12. Hey, I like Kyp, what did he ruin?! Never liked Callista, didn’t know they looped her into the clone wars, I’ll have to check it out…

  14. My problem with Kyp was that he DESTROYED AN ENTIRE SOLAR SYSTEM. I understand that Luke is really big on redeeming and forgiving everyone, but DESTROYING AN ENTIRE SOLAR SYSTEM seems a bit on the harsh side.

    But that may be my bias against superweapons creeping out here.

  15. Yes. Kyp’s “redemption” makes no sense. If Anakin hadn’t died on the Death Star he would have been tried for war crimes and executed. Same should have happened to Kyp.

  17. I know he destroyed an entire solar system, as a teenager, right? From what I recall, Kyp was under the influence of a long dead sith ghost, A threat Luke overlooked when establishing his Jedi academy. Don’t feel he ruins anything, just an interesting plot twist. I was far more disappointed by the death of Anakin Solo… saw posted somewhere that the decision was made b/c the prequels were coming out, and they didn’t want people to be confused by 2 main characters named Anakin. Kinda feels like an insult to my intelligence as a reader, like I’d be reading along and suddenly go “Um, wait, Anakin who?”

  19. i thought they went snow skiing….

    i think you’re thinking of Happy Days, where Han took Fonz water skiing. “It’s the ship that jumped the Kessel Shark in less than 12 parsecs!”

  23. I discovered this a while back, but thanks for bringing it to my attention again.

    I don’t know whether this list gives me hope (because it shows SW fans can laugh at themselves) or fills me with despair (because I know people have whinged about all these thngs and more). I’m going to be optimistic and go with hope.

  24. *snort* Love it.

    Also, that article is out of date because TOR (the KOTOR MMORPG) has already been claimed by KOTOR fans as ruining Star Wars forever since it was announced. ;)

  25. Also Star Tours 2.0 will certainly ruin Star Wars forever. Not even to mention Star Wars in 3D.

    BTW: Love how Traviss shows up twice. “Mando addicts with long-term contracts.” Oh, yes, sir!

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