Club Jade

And the trailer is safe for work. It looks awful! Shocking.

I have no idea if this is authorized (very probably not) but there’s no denying that the Artoo swimsuit is pretty neat. But since it’s a bit late in the season for swimming, perhaps galaxy leggings are more in order. (Only if you can accept that they are not pants, ladies.)

Women in Star Wars. MagnetGirl hijacks our pal Mandy’s blog to talk about Ahsoka and last week’s episode ‘Assassin.’

Craftacular. The Millennium Falcon apple pie, because edible crafts are the best crafts. And you know what this cries for? A lightsaber pie cutter.

Fanboy corner. Gizmodo’s Joel Johnson says it’s time to let the prequel butthurt die and forgive George Lucas. Yes, boys: You don’t have to love the prequels (Hell, I don’t) but just accept them as they are (until George SEs them) and move on. And on that note, Cracked has five reasons for Hollywood to stop making prequels.

It will not die. The rumor is still getting batted around, so Underwire brings us five reasons Lucas should film a new trilogy.

“Luke, I will not be your father!” proclaims this French condom package discovered by Geeks Are Sexy. Sure, it’s most likely a Photoshop job, but at least it’s a funny one.

Well, not quite literally. (Twilight we are not.) But there is a notable resemblance between the Form 2 and the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy. (Nothing overtly NSFW at the link, although some of the links there are.)

Looking for something more G-rated? The Brits are at it again with a Luke Skywalker bathrobe.

Leave it to Japan to make the Holiday Special look tasteful and restrained. (via)

The internet’s favorite Star Wars cake – this week. As impressive as this Tauntaun grooms cake is, I’m not sure I’d want to eat it. Still, props to the folks at Cake Nouveau for really capturing the moment. And by moment I meant slimy tauntaun guts. (Their dazed-out Luke is amazingly good, too.)

Artoo found in Transformers 2. Are there enough oil baths in the world to get the poor droid clean after this?

Seriously? Someone is taking their dedication to authentic costuming a little too far.

Quack Vader. This unauthorized ’70′s Vader light looks like something Robot Chicken would come up with. Maybe Seth Green had one, too?

And finally… Sideshow has a site up for the customized stormtrooper figures they showed off at SDCC.

A few things I’ve been micro-blogging @clubjade lately. (300 followers and counting…)

Wowza. Danny Choo discovered Cho Woong’s incredible Star Wars room. I’m not normally a fan of collector chic, but for this guy I’m willing to make an exception.

Lists. Empire Strikes Back comes in at #6 on Empire’s list of the top 50 movie sequels, while Return of the Jedi clocks in at #21. Meanwhile, Star Wars is one of Geek Tyrant’s five films that changed the way people look at sci-fi movies. And Cracked checks out the five strangest post-Star Wars careers.

Tee. The environmentally-correct way to handle those lightsabered droid remains. Also: Hans Solo! (via)

Protip. It’s highly unlikely that Dark Horse was inspired by your fanfic, and saying so is your one-way ticket to a mass mocking.

You get this. Actually, the personal stalker-shadow is the least disturbing of the two unofficial Twilight products to emerge (so to speak) this week, but it is the only one actually appropriate to slapping up on this site at 500 pixels wide. The other one is so not safe for work or direct linking, if you get what I’m saying, and I think you do. (via)

The “Galactic Lord Corset Costume” from Evening Arwen can be yours for a mere $600. There’s even an option for your loyal henchwomen, the “Galactic Trooper Corset Costume.” (via)

I actually think George would approve. For a second. Before he called his lawyers.

• Threepio takes a whupping on Tin: Old Skool.

• Show your inner green with Rubyred’s Jedi Ecosaber. (Or how about some Star Wars Coffee?)
• Gross out at least some of your friends with Android Love from Joannarchy!
• Get down-home with Anakin Skywalker or Darth Vader from DieselLaws.