Club Jade

I don’t like your jerkoff name, I don’t like your jerkoff face, I don’t like your jerkoff behavior and I don’t like you. Jerk off.

Visions. The cat is officially out of the bag on the upcoming art book, and the previews keep on coming. I’m rather taken with the classical styles of the Daniel E. Greene and Will Wilson pieces.

First look. Bonnie Burton’s craft book!

The blogside:Ben Kuchera of Ars Technica draws a parallel between Grand Admiral Thrawn, Exar Kun, and the Sith of The Old Republic; Maya Kaathryn Bohnhoff on making up planets.

Interviews: NJOE talks to Invasion’s Tom Taylor.

Lists. Topless Robot’s Adam Pawlus counts down his list of the ten best stories in the Expanded Universe. The vast majority of these are at best unnoteworthy to this EU fan, and I certainly can’t condone anyone who puts a Boba Fett comic above the Thrawn trology. (Zahn may not be perfect… But Boba Fett? How uncivilized.)

Namesake corner. Sideshow says Mara Jade will make “an appearance in one of our lines by 2011.”

Quotables. Alice in Wonderland producer Richard D. Zanuck calls George Lucas “the Thomas Edison of our time.”

Weequay Thranta Fambaa. A girl on German game show can ID Lego action figures with her mouth. That’s a skill that’ll take her far. (via)

Under the stars. Take a peek at this Star Wars nursery.

Well, it is kind of true. Yoda is one of Cracked’s 6 famous movie wisemen who were totally full of shit.

This list by Pablo is actually from a few years back, but it got a bit of a spiff-up for the new format, and what the hell — it is Halloween, and the internet has the collective memory of a goldfish for stuff like this. (Not you, Wookieepedia.) Have at it, kids.

Embrace the pain. Inspired by the latest in transparent rumor-mongering, Cracked puts their well-worn Wookieepedia bookmark to use to come up with five reasons the Star Wars sequels would be worse than the prequels. As an EU fan, I say… Well, yeah. It’s easy to be hard on the prequels, but we can’t deny that the post-ROTJ EU is at least equally screwed up. (I for one have no problem admitting the EU is probably worse. One word, kids: Volume. Also, [insert your least favorite author/book here.])

Not that I would expect George to actually use the existing EU for much besides a few spare parts if he ever did decide to make a sequel trilogy. But various statements he’s made over the last few years show he really doesn’t see much in the sequel era – Han Solo and the Backyard Barbecue much?

Postponed. The Complete Vader will be getting a new release date due to printing issues. It was supposed to be out on Tuesday, but better a nice, carefully reconstructed book than a complete crispy mess completely encased in plastic, right?

The blogside. Mike Stackpole on assumption that authors are their characters.

From the horse’s mouth. A speculative TFN thread prompts John Ostrander to make a preemptive strike and announce that Legacy will not be following in the footsteps of Knights of the Old Republic and ending with issue #50.

Also in comics: Previews for Legacy #41, Invasion #5, The Clone Wars #10 and the one-shot Purge: Seconds to Die.

CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Crafting corner. There are two Mara Jade items in this roundup, and here’s the first one. Rebecca aka Sorakirei, whose first lightsaber scarf we featured earlier in the month, has another made another one. The Mara Jade lightsaber scarf was a commission – could it be from one of our readers? It’s a big internet… She’s also done a ROTJ Luke saber since we last looked…

The Blogside: Joe Schreiber on haunted houses and Maya Kaathryn Bohnhoff on musical parody.

Action figures: A closer look at Jacen and Jaina.

Previews: Legacy #40, Knights of the Old Republic #46 and Invasion #4, which gives us our first look at (a fairly generic and perhaps Renaissance-Fair attending) Mara.

Lists: Topless Robot has a very Marvel-heavy list of the eleven least necessary Star Wars comics. Yes, its another one of those lists that was probably compiled by hitting the random button on the Wookieepedia, but I’m considering doing a novel version. (Since I’ve actually, like, read a lot of them. Imagine that. The New Rebellion, are your ears stinging yet?)

Will it blend? Saturday Night Live’s Kristen Wiig wore a Darth Vader meets Kiss of the Spider Woman dress to the Emmys. Sorry, Bonnie: I’m pretty sure she full deserves that D. But at least we get blog content out of it.

IMMA LET YOU FINISH. Congratulations, it’s a week-old meme in Star Wars form!

Talkies. If you’re in the mood for some old school audio drama, Star Wars en Direct’s Dany Pépin is starting some aural fan fiction, ‘In the Shadows,’ next month.

Lists of dubious (and not-so-dubious) honors. Luke is #1 on Spike’s list of the top ten white trash heroes of cinema, while Lando is one of io9′s ten most corrupt mayors in science fiction. Uh, thanks? I guess. On an entirely different note, A New Hope tops Paste’s ten most iconic opening scenes. (via)

Oh, Cracked. ‘Retarded’ is not a word we use. Still, one has to give them a bit of credit for looking the most horrific aspects of the EU (Sorry, Death Troopers) full on in the face. I suspect this list was compiled by someone who spent an hour or two on the Wook and not an actual reader, because how else could any reader forget the golden magnificence and ultimate WTFness of Waru?

When the stormies come marching in. io9 goes for the cheap and easy with a roundup of Star Wars fan art inspired by religious art. Half of it is photoshoppery and such that we’ve seen before, but the icons by Patrick King are pretty cool.

Theories. Some day George will want to buy a tropical island and sit around drinking mai tais all day, and then I’ll consider Disney buying Lucasfilm an actual possibility. For one thing, I don’t think the FCC would be too thrilled about it…

Facebook. There’s an unofficial Celebration V fan page you can join, if so inclined. Meanwhile, the latest tidbit on the con? You can win a free trip to it. Does that mean we’ll get a date before Halloween? We can but dream…

McAdvertising. Vader is shilling for McDonalds in Europe.

Lists. The Falcon and a couple of other Star Wars ships on Den of Geek’s top 75 spaceships.

There really is something for everyone on Etsy. I’m prepping a few posts for next week, and I ran across a Luke and Mara Wedding cake topper. (What a post-ROTJ EU pairing has to do with The Clone Wars I have no idea.) The seller, Hildoom, also has a Yoda Birthday Cake topper for sale.

Cars. Jalopnik is on something of a streak, exploring the hot rod culture of Star Wars and likening the ABT Audi R8 V10 to something that “Anakin’s coke dealer” would drive.

Back to school. StarWars.com takes a look back at the 70′s with retro class cear from Helix.

Lists. Palpatine makes #1 on Sci-Fi Squad’s top ten sci-fi deaths.

Cakes. A neat Millenium Falcon by Da Bombe Desserts.

If only… io9 suggests swapping the writing staffs of The Clone Wars and the The Venture Brothers, which may be the only way to get me to cheerfully watch the former.